Snowy Dreaming~

Post 513
NC 17

This is all make believe, Brian, Justin, all characters, QAF, all belong to Cowlip, Showtime, etc. This is just for fun.



Michael and Brian had been dancing on the go-go stand to the imaginary thumpa thumpa in the darkened club for at least ten minutes. Brian finally stopped moving and looked at Mikey, gently hugged him and then started to look around at the devastation that was in reality his life. Babylon had been bombed, lives had been lost. Liberty Avenue would never be the same and they would never be the same. There was still no official word yet that the bombing was a hate crime relating to the Prop 14 party but everyone knew that it was no coincidence that the person or persons responsible would probably never be found.

Brian stood there and wondered, had it really only been a few hours before that he had been in the loft with Justin, that he and Justin had said what Brian knew were their final goodbyes. He knew in his heart that once Justin arrived in New York, settled in and got his art career started that Brian probably wouldn’t even hear from him, much less see him again.

“Why the fuck would he even give me a second thought once he hit the big apple, I know I wouldn’t be looking back” Brian said out loud without realizing.

Michael heard him mumbling something and said “What did you say Brian?”

“I said I need a fucking drink”. Brian started down the steps of the go-go stand with Michael behind him holding onto his shoulders, still a bit unsteady on his feet but getting better every day. They made their way through the darkened club out onto Liberty Avenue.

As he and Michael stood outside of the club staring at the police tape that weeks later still surrounded the building, the debris still on the ground, Michael could see that Brian was already missing Justin even though it had only been hours since he had been gone and he also knew that Brian would never admit it even to his best friend. This was going to be a lot harder than Michael thought. A light snow had been falling for a few hours but it had gotten worse since they had been in the club.

“Shit, it is fucking cold out here!” Brian said as he lit a cigarette and started to button his coat.

“Let’s go grab some breakfast at the diner, Mom’s working the late shift” Michael said reluctant to leave Brian.

“I don’t want breakfast! Brian said in a harsh tone, "and I sure as fuck don’t want to deal with your mother right now. What I want and what I need is another drink!”

Michael grabbed Brian’s arms and turned to face him, “You’ve already had too much to drink and I think you need something to eat.”

“Take your ass home to your hubby”, Brian said, “ I don't need a babysitter and I don’t want to be responsible for yet another fag divorce, I’ll be just fine”.

“Are you sure, because Ben said I could hang out as long as you needed me”, but as usual the words had slipped out of Michael’s mouth before they were censored.

“What the fuck?? Don’t trust me to be alone Mikey? Think I might do something stupid?” Brian said, his voice even more hateful than he had intended.

“No,” Michael said, “I just know how you must be feeling and if it were me I wouldn’t want to be alone right now.”

“Wait a damn minute!!, Brian said, yelling at Michael, “First of all, You are not me, and second, I already said I DO NOT need a fucking babysitter. I have managed to take care of myself for this long and I am sure I can continue to do so without any assistance from YOU or the PROFESSOR, or ANYBODY ELSE for that matter, so you can just run on home and tell hubby thanks so much for the concern but no thanks,” he sneered, looking up and down the street while taking another drag from his cigarette before throwing it down in the gutter.

Michael knew Brian was hurting so he allowed the verbal assault. Once Brian was done with his tirade he looked Michael in the eyes, pulled him in close for a quick kiss and an embrace and said, “Now get the fuck outta here” and gently shoved him away.


~~~

Brian pulled his cell from his pocket and checked for missed calls, there weren’t any. Shit, he was hoping that Justin would have at least called when he landed at JFK but Brian guessed Justin was too busy getting settled to take the time to call him.

Brian looked at his watch and noticed it was already 2am but he just couldn’t go back to the loft yet. He wouldn’t be able to handle it, he definitely wouldn’t be able to sleep so he started to walk down Liberty Avenue and decided to stop in at Woody’s for a nightcap. Maybe a few more drinks and a few anonymous blowjobs would take his mind off of the only thing he had ever wanted or needed his entire life but just didn’t know it or maybe want to admit it until now, until …Justin.

As Brian walked into Woody’s he looked around and the place was dead. He approached the bar and had his choice of seats. He looked at the bartender, ordered his drink and said, “Shit, how the hell am I supposed to get a blowjob in this graveyard? Where the hell is everybody?” The bartender shrugged his shoulders, took a moment to make his drink, set it in front of him and said, “We close in about an hour and then I’ll be available”. Brian’s eyebrows raised in approval when his name was called from across the empty room.

“HEY BRIIIAAANNN!”

That familiar bellow can belong to but one person, Brian thought. He turned to see the only other person in the bar, Debbie Novotny!

“What the fuck are you doing in here?” She asked in that all too familiar ear splitting tone.

Brian looked at her with a smirk and said, “Not that it is any of your fucking business but I am having a drink or ten. More importantly the question should be what the fuck are you doing in here?”

Debbie being Debbie didn’t ask if she could join him she just pulled a stool up next to him and sat down. “ I had a late shift at the diner and since Karl is working midnights and Em has a new friend over, I thought I would give them another hour or so before I broke up the party”.

“Well, aren’t you just the best mom ever,” Brian sneered as he motioned to the bartender for another drink.

“Well, aren’t you being a class A asshole!” Debbie said as she bumped Brian’s shoulder with her own almost knocking him off of his stool. Michael had stopped by the diner on his way home and told her about Brian’s downward spiral. She knew he was hurting but she wasn’t going to take his shit the way that Michael had earlier that evening.

“I guess Justin got off okay today” Debbie asked.

“Quite a few times” Brian said with a smirk, “Thanks for asking”.

“I meant his flight, you shit”! She said, glimpsing the old Brian for a moment.

“ I know what you meant”, he replied. He looked at his cell phone again, nothing.

Debbie felt her heart break because she knew what Brian was giving up when he told Justin to go to New York. She knew how much he loved Justin and even though he was trying to be a hard ass right now, she knew he was starting to crack just a little.

Brian looked at his watch for the tenth time, only thirty minutes had passed since he had come into Woody’s and Debbie was still blabbering on about something but his mind had drifted again….to Justin. “Fuck,” Brian thought how long was this going to last?

“Um, Deb I need to get home, I have some work I need to do”. Brian said as he stood up to leave, downing his drink and throwing a twenty on the bar and putting his coat on.

“But I was going to tell you about the time when Karl and me tried that lube that you..” but Brian cut her off.

“No rest for the weary Deb, especially when you’re the boss, sorry.” Brian said.

The bartender also noticed Brian preparing to leave and said, “Hey man what about that blowjob, I don’t get off for another 30 minutes!”

“It’s gonna be a lot longer than that,” Brian said with a smile as he walked out the door leaving Debbie laughing and the bartender giving him a dirty look. As Brian stepped outside he noticed the snow was even deeper, he looked up at the sky for a moment, watching the snow as it continued to fall and started to walk home.

~~~


As he lifted the gate of the elevator and entered the hall he looked at the door to the loft. He hesitated before he put the key in the lock. The memories of only a few hours ago were already rushing back to him. What the hell would happen once he slid that door open? He stood there with his forehead against the cold metal for what felt like forever but it had really only been a few minutes. Oh well, might as well bite the bullet and get it over with.

He could smell Justin the moment he stepped into the loft. Justin wasn’t even there anymore yet he was everywhere. Brian inhaled deeply and recalled the hours before when they were together and he remembered that he couldn’t get close enough to Justin.

It had been around 8:00pm. Justin’s flight was scheduled to leave at 10. They had fucked at least three times and he wanted more and Justin said as much too but the cab had already been called thirty minutes before. The fact was he didn’t want to let Justin go, he had changed his mind, AGAIN, but he kept it to himself. He wrapped himself around Justin and cried silent tears, mourning the lover he was losing forever. The one person who accepted him for what he was, who he was, with all his flaws. Of course Brian never admitted to anyone that he had any flaws but Justin saw through him and loved him anyway. Justin had refused to let Brian take him to the airport. Justin knew it would be too difficult to say goodbye and as hard as it was for Brian to admit it would have been even harder still for him. Sunshine was far wiser than his years.

As Brian came farther into the room he looked around hoping to at least see little reminders left here and there, maybe something forgotten, even though he didn’t need anything physical to remind him. His eyes surveyed the room and he saw the ring box sitting on the table where Justin left it. He paused for a moment before picking up the box and then he held it to his heart and recalled Justin’s words…”We don’t need vows or rings to prove we love each other, we already know that.” Brian knew it too. He also knew there would never be room in his heart for anyone else but Justin and he was okay with that. Brian put the ring box in his pants pocket, he would put it in Justin’s drawer for safekeeping.


He walked over to the computer to check his email and saw numerous messages from Michael and others but none from Justin so he left it and walked over to the refrigerator and grabbed the Jim Beam bottle and took a seat at the counter. He unscrewed the cap and didn’t even bother with a glass. He took a long pull from the bottle and noticed the message light flashing on the phone.

He hit the play button hoping to hear Justin’s voice but instead heard the generic voice of the answering machine ….

First message….”Hey Brian, it’s Michael just checking to make sure you made it home. We’re still meeting for breakfast right? It’s snowing pretty damn hard. Give me a call tomorrow. Okay? Bye.” Brian hit the delete button.


Next message…”Brian, It’s Deb, just wanted to check on you .You were pretty fucking drunk when you left Woody’s. You should have seen that bartender’s face when you walked out! Man, was he pissed! Have you heard from sunshine yet?? Let me know, will ya? Bye.” Brian hit delete again but not quick enough.

Brian yells to the empty room, JESUS, DO THESE FUCKING PEOPLE EVER SLEEP???

Brian takes one more swig from the Jim Beam bottle and replaces the cap. He starts to slowly walk towards the bedroom turning off lights. He knows that even with all the alcohol that he has consumed he will not sleep tonight. He suddenly hears something that makes him stop moving, something he has waited for all night, the sound of Justin’s voice on the answering machine. He starts walking slowly again towards his bedroom feeling a bit more relaxed and starts walking up the stairs listening to Justin’s voice as he unbuttons his shirt.

Next message…”Hey Bri, did you know it is snowing like crazy outside? You will never believe this but my flight has been delayed like three fucking times and then they finally cancelled it, so I figured I could kill some time by waiting for you to get your ass back home and fuck my brains out!” And the phone clicks off just as Brian hits the top step, unbuttons the last button of his shirt and comes into the bedroom.

There in his bed was Sunshine, lying on top of the sheets bathed in the muted blue light, with the biggest grin on his face, waving a condom in one hand and his cock in the other. Brian was very glad to be home.


~~~

“Where the fuck have you been?” Justin asked with a giggle “I was about to start without you, again.”

“It’s a short but boring story,” Brian said as he started to remove his shirt, “and I am sure we can find better things to do right now than talk, don’t you?”

Justin sat up in the bed and watched as Brian tried to unbutton his pants but he was having a bit of a problem with the first button when he heard “Stop right there!” Justin said, “I believe you may be under the influence sir, and you must be strip searched for alcohol and illegal substances”.

"Get up against the wall.” Justin said in a stern voice. Brian just stood there with his head tilted slightly wondering exactly what kind of game Justin was playing.

“NOW!” Justin said more forcefully as he got up from the bed and grabbed Brian’s wrists.

Justin shoved Brian up against the wall and held his hands to his side. Justin used Brian’s shirt to keep his hands confined while he took little nips along Brian’s shoulders and neck. Justin then said ”I am going to search you now sir, please spread your legs.” Brian complied by barely opening his legs. Justin stuck his foot in between Brian’s legs and forcefully spread them farther apart.

“Wider! Sir” Justin said louder, loving the control he felt over Brian. Brian could feel his erection straining against his jeans as he was pushed against the wall. Justin began sliding his hand up Brian’s leg finally reaching the zipper and what he had been searching for, or so he thought.

He felt something oddly shaped and stopped his search long enough to say,” What the fuck is going on Brian, When I left here your dick looked, worked and FELT fine so how have you managed to completely fucking change it in a matter of hours?”

Brian just stood there totally lost in the mood not even registering what Justin was saying. His hands were still bound in the shirt. He struggled to get his hands loose and unbuttoned his pants and felt his cock and said “there is nothing wrong with my equipment, shit if you have already forgotten what my cock feels like after being gone only a few hours maybe you shouldn’t be going anywhere.” Brian sucked in his lips and tried to cover up what he said by tackling Justin to the bed. “Now are you gonna blow me or what?” Brian said as he took off his pants. Justin grabbed the pants and felt both pockets and pulled out the contents. Brian tried to distract Justin by trailing kisses down his stomach but stopped just as he dipped his tongue into Justin’s bellybutton. Justin wasn’t responding to Brian’s touch as he normally did with hungry passion and desire of his own and Brian knew why. He knew why Justin was quiet without looking but tilted his head up to stare into those questioning blue eyes and waited for the questions that would follow.

~~~

There in Justin’s hand was the ring box. The rings that they were going to get married with, the ones that they said they didn’t need, the ones that Justin walked away from. He held the box up and looked at Brian who was looking back at him. “Why do you have this in your pocket” Justin asked. “Did you try to pawn them?” he asked half jokingly but almost scared to hear the answer.
“Yes, Justin," Brian said in his sarcastic tone, "because I could get so much more than I paid for them at a pawn shop you little twat. As a matter of fact, not that it is any of your business but I saw the box on the table where YOU left it and was going to put it in the drawer until I could figure out what to do with them.”

“Now, exactly where were we?” Brian said trying to put himself back into position between Justin’s legs.

“Wait”, Justin said, grabbing Brian by the shoulders halting his descent, “can we talk for a few minutes?”

"Justin, your message on the machine clearly did not say you wanted me to talk your brains out, it said you wanted me to FUCK your brains out. Now I believe, Brian said dragging out his words and then deeply kissing Justin, and I can call Mel if you want, that that constitutes some type of verbal contract and as such is binding under some fucking fag law somewhere, so can we please save the chit chat for later, hm - much later?" Brian said in a husky voice as he kissed Justin even more roughly and started once again to make his way down Justin’s body with his tongue.

Justin did not try to stop him this time; in fact he dropped the ring box beside the bed and slowly put his hands on each side of Brian’s head and helped guide his way quickly to the intended target. He laid his head back against the pillow and felt Brian’s tongue teasing his cock, knowing exactly what drove Justin just to the edge of orgasm and then Brian would stop and look up at Justin with that grin, wait a moment for him to regain control and then begin again. This went on for what seemed to Justin forever, which was fine with him because he loved every minute of it, but then finally Brian decided he could no longer take the torture either.

Brian grabbed a condom and the lube from the bedside table and when Justin started to roll away from him to get into position, Brian stopped him and said in almost a whisper, “Sunshine, I want you facing me , I need you looking at me like the first time. I want to look into your eyes when you come like the first time. I want you looking into mine like the first time, do you remember our first time, Justin?”

Justin took the condom package from Brian’s hand and ripped it open with his teeth and placed the condom on Brian’s cock and then he stopped and looked into Brian’s eyes and said, “Listen to me for a minute Brian, are you listening?”

“Yes”, Brian said, gazing into Justin’s eyes.

“I will love you no matter what Brian, no matter where I am, no matter who I am with, no matter what, that will never change so please always remember that, will you do that for me?” Justin asked as a small tear fell from his eye.

Brian didn’t see the tear and kissed Justin passionately and said, “Yes, sunshine, I think I can remember that.”

They made love then, more than once; at first lovingly, and then increasing with such intensity that Brian thought sure his heart would explode. Brian would never admit it out loud but the past forty-eight hours had just about sucked him dry literally. He was exhausted but happy. Brian had his leg thrown possessively over Justin’s so that he couldn’t move, not that he wanted to. He felt safe under Brian, felt protected, didn’t ever want to move, but he wouldn’t think about that now so he snuggled up to Brian and started to absently stoke his upper thigh and whispered “I love you Brian” and Brian, eyes closed but still awake kissed the top of his head and said” I love you too Sunshine, but stop trying to molest me, my dick is already about to fall off, go to sleep.”

~~~

Justin opened his eyes and turned his head to look over at his lover. Brian was still sleeping and actually looked content and happy and totally fucked out. Justin smiled to himself. He never thought he would see the day that the mighty Mr. Kinney wasn’t “up” for some action. Last night was the best sex they had had since, well since yesterday. He looked over at the clock on the nightstand and realized that it was 12:30 and he was starving. He knew Brian would sleep for another few hours and Justin needed to check on his flight so he quietly slid from under Brian and grabbed his clothes from the floor. When he picked up the tangled clothes the forgotten ring box tumbled to the floor with a thud. Justin quickly looked from the floor to the bed to see if the sound woke Brian.

He should have known that after last night nothing short of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir marching through the loft could wake Brian and even that was debatable unless they could raise his dick from the dead and much as Justin hated to admit it, his ass needed a rest.

Justin stood there for a moment gazing down at the man that he loved more than anything else in the world. The first man he gave himself to, the only one who would ever have his heart, the one person that through all the bullshit was always there when he needed him, even when they weren’t together. Brian always knew somehow if he was in trouble financially or emotionally and Brian was always there. People could say whatever they wanted but Justin knew the real Brian Kinney.

Justin took one last look at his true love and then looked at the ring box in his hand, he then held the box to his heart for a moment and then took it with him as he quietly walked to the living room to get dressed.


~~~


Brian squinted as he opened his eyes. He wondered if he was dead and rats were chewing on his dick. It felt like it was on fire. He slowly lifted the covers and looked to make sure there wasn’t anything gnawing on it. No, upon inspection his cock although slightly raw in areas still looked in working order, though not any time soon, Brian thought with a smile.

He then looked around the room, other than numerous used condom wrappers lying all over the bed and floor, and the sheets totally ripped from the mattress the bedroom still looked intact. He sat up in the bed slowly as his head was pounding from all the booze he consumed the night before. He looked over at the clock on the nightstand. 4:15 p.m.?? No fucking way! He tried to remember back to last night and recall if he had taken anything aside from the normal recreational drugs that would have caused him to be in this kind of agony both mentally and physically. He couldn’t think of anything, shit he couldn’t think.

“Justin?” Brian managed to utter rather timidly as talking even quietly hurt. When there was no response he slowly put his feet over the side of the bed and waited a moment until the room righted itself and then he stood and staggered towards the kitchen. “Hey, Justin! Why did you let me sleep so long?” Brian said sounding a little annoyed.

He looked around the loft. There was no movement, no activity. “Justin?” Brian said even louder though it hurt like hell, still no answer. He walked over to the kitchen and noticed that there was no coffee made, there were no dishes in the sink. He didn’t see Justin’s luggage, nothing. It was as if Justin hadn’t been there at all. He made a complete circuit around the loft and everything was as he left it the night before right down to the Jim Beam bottle on the counter and the ring box on the table.

What the fuck was going on?? He walked back over to the table and picked up the ring box. He held onto it and looked towards the bedroom. He tried to think back to last night. It started off shitty enough with his having to say goodbye to Justin probably for the last time, which broke his heart so he figured he would dull the pain with a few shots of Jim Beam. Michael came over and took him to Babylon, which was still a fucking mess, and actually admitted feeling sorry for him which was so fucking laughable it was depressing. That definitely required more alcohol. Sitting at Woody’s at 2am with Deb for company? Brian didn’t think there was enough alcohol in the U.S. and Canada to make up for that little irony, but sure why the fuck not have another round. So coming home alone, he thought one more shot couldn’t hurt, but then finding Justin in his bed? Brian definitely had no more need for alcohol. He had different needs entirely.

But now he realized that he must have been so drunk last night or so high that he brought a trick home and was so out of it that he imagined the guy to be Justin. God, did he miss him that much already? He had done it before, brought guys home that looked like Justin because he missed the little fucker so much. This guy felt like Justin though, he smelled like Justin, he even looked like Justin. That could be the only explanation, Brian thought. Either that or it was the most vivid, fucking dream he had ever had!

But he remembered putting the ring box in his pocket and Justin finding it, questioning him, didn’t he? Yet, here was the box right where Justin left it on the table yesterday. He was so confused, his mind still so fuzzy, but finding no other explanation and with no sign that Justin had ever returned he could only blame it on all the alcohol and his extreme loneliness for his lover.

Brian didn’t think he could feel any worse than he did right now. His head felt as if it was about to explode, his heart already so broken he didn’t think it would ever mend. He was about to walk into the bedroom to put the ring box into Justin’s drawer until he could put it in the safe deposit box, when even though he knew he shouldn’t, he had to look at the rings one more time.

He slowly opened the box and just stared, mouth hanging open. The rings were gone! “FUCK!! FUCK!! FUCK! DAMN! DAMN! FUCK! Someone had stolen the rings??” Brian yelled. He started to frantically search around the room, getting more desperate as the minutes ticked by. He ran into the bedroom turning the mattress upside down, throwing everything about, and turning the room into a shambles, nothing.


Brian tried to remember whom he brought here last night but his mind was not functioning at all. He couldn’t think. The harder he tried to remember, the more his head began to throb. The only face he can see is Justin’s. “Shit, if Justin finds out the rings were stolen, he will cut off the only ball I have left!” Brian mutters.

Brian forgets about his throbbing head and starts across the room for the phone to call the police. He can’t believe he was so fucking stupid to let a trick into the loft. One, hell apparently it was a shit load more than one with all the empty condom wrappers lying around. That he could have been so careless with the rings, what was wrong with him? Why did he let Justin go, why couldn’t they have worked something out? Why do I always have to be so fucking stubborn, he thought to himself.

“Shit, I wish I could change things,” Brian said out loud” I wish he was here so I could tell him I love him”, I wish I still had the rings so I could have put his on his finger before he ever walked out that damn door! I wish all this hadn’t been a fucking dream!” Brian said as he sat down heavily on the barstool, laid his head in his arms on the counter and finally cried for what he knew he sent away, his opportunity for happiness.

All of a sudden he heard a noise at the door and as he looked up he saw Justin standing there with a bakery bag in one hand and two coffee containers in the other looking over at him with tears running down his face. Brian just stared for a minute not sure if he was hallucinating or if what he saw in front of him was actually real.


“Please say that again,” Justin asked.

Brian continued to stare for a moment longer and then realized that indeed Justin was really there and what Justin meant.

“I wish I could change things”, Brian said.

“You can”, Justin said.

“ I wish you were here so I could tell you that I love you.” Brian said.

“I am.” Justin said.

“I do love you Justin”, Brian said.

“And?” Justin said waiting impatiently.

“I can’t fulfill the third request, Justin, I’m sorry, please let me explain.” Brian pleaded, knowing already that Justin knew he had let a trick into the loft and the rings had been stolen.

Justin put the coffee down and put his hand into his pants pocket and he pulled something out and held it in his fist. He extended his hand out towards Brian. Justin slowly opened his hand and there in his palm lay the two rings that were missing from the box.

“When I found the ring box in your pants last night, you wouldn’t tell me why it was there and I asked you if you tried to pawn them and you wouldn’t say, so I took them so you couldn’t sell them.” Justin held his head down in shame. “I'm sorry” he said.



Brian slowly stood up and walked over to Justin and pulled him into an embrace and kissed him and said, “you were here last night weren’t you, and it wasn’t a dream? "Fuck! I thought I had finally lost my fucking mind!” Brian wrapped his arms around Justin tightly to make sure that he was real. Apparently a little too tightly because the next thing he heard was a muffled voice saying, “I caantt breatthh.” Brian loosened his grip, stepped back and said “what?”

Justin took a deep breath and replied, “I said, I couldn’t breath”, he giggled as he kissed Brian on the neck. Brian took the rings from Justin and put them back in the ring box.

“Let’s keep these in here where they belong for the moment, shall we”, Brian said with a smile.

Justin grabbed the coffee and bakery bag and walked with Brian over to the couch. Brian put the ring box on the table by the computer as he passed it. Justin walked by the bedroom and looked in and saw the mess and said, “What the fuck happened in there while I was gone?”

Brian grabbed Justin’s ass and turned his body towards the couch and said, “Well, I thought I lost something priceless but luckily it turned up, with coffee no less” Brian said with a smirk. They sat on the couch and Justin started to bite into a donut when red jam squirted out onto Brian and the white leather sofa. Justin’s eyes started to get as big as saucers knowing how particular Brian was about his furniture. Justin threw the donut in the bag and started to jump up to get something to clean up the mess apologizing the whole time. “Oh shit Bri, damn, I’m sorry, I swear I will clean it up,” and before he could completely stand up Brian grabbed the bag and wiped the jelly off the sofa and said, “fuck it, I have to talk to you, leave it for now. “

“But it’s gonna leave a stain!” Justin said.

“I said to leave it!" Brian said louder. "Please, sit back down”

Justin thought that Brian was either still totally drunk or had started taking Prozac because this was so NOT Brian Kinney behavior, but he sat back down facing Brian and waited, for what, he wasn’t quite sure.

Brian looked into Justin’s eyes and took a deep breath and began, “Justin, you know that there have never been locks on these doors, you know that you and I could always come and go as we pleased and we have for almost five years, but there was one thing here that had been locked up for a long time, a lock I thought no one could ever break, for more reasons than I care to go into right now, but from the first time I saw you standing under that streetlight, I felt something.”

“I knew it!” Justin exclaimed with a smile, “I knew you loved me even then, I told you,” he said smugly.

Brian placed his hand over Justin’s mouth gently but firmly and said in a quiet but authoritative tone, “didn’t your mother ever teach you to not interrupt? Do you want me to continue or not because my head is pounding like a motherfucker and I could really use a drink.”

“Yes," Justin pleaded, "I’m sorry, please continue, I swear I will keep quiet.” He then kissed Brian on the lips and sat back against the couch but held onto Brian’s hand.


Brian rolled his eyes towards the ceiling, looked back at Justin, sucked in his lips and started again, “All I want to say is that somehow you saw something in me that no one else saw. You were a stubborn little shit and you wouldn’t give up on me even when I gave up on myself, what I want you to know Justin, is that you have made me a better person and who would have ever thought it, a better homosexual.” Brian said his voice cracking just a little but then he grabbed Justin in his arms and kissed him deeply and said, “and if you tell anyone that I said any of this, I will deny it and I will turn you over my knee and spank your ass!”

Justin had begun to cry but as Brian made this last statement they both burst into laughter. As their laughter subsided, Brian asked a question he didn’t really want the answer to, “so, what time is your flight leaving?”

Justin looked at Brian for a long moment and said rather quietly, “ I cancelled it”, and then he waited for the verbal tongue-lashing he was about to receive for not rescheduling, as he knew Brian wanted him to do, but much to his surprise Brian didn’t seem upset at all. In fact, if anything he seemed pleased and said with a smile, “well, since you don’t have to rush off, why don’t we take a long, hot shower because to be honest, we both smell like shit. We’ll go grab a bite to eat, some real food, not that high carb shit you got all over my couch," he said with a grin, "and I can tell you about a business venture I am seriously considering, because I’d like to get your opinion.”

Oh no, Justin thought, another vintage car, another business, another Babylon?

"Damn, Brian don’t you have enough shit to deal with already?”

“No,” Brian laughed as he walked towards the bathroom shedding clothes as he went, "it would have to be a hell of a lot bigger than a car but not as big as Babylon necessarily, at least not in the beginning.” Justin was following behind him also taking off clothes as he walked. Brian stepped into the shower and turned on the hot water and adjusted the temperature letting the water run over his body and looked over at Justin. “Are you coming in or what?”

Justin stepped into the shower behind Brian and started to get his hair wet. “What kind of business venture are you considering exactly?” Justin asked.

“Well, Brian said as he handed Justin the soap, "I have had Cynthia checking on what is available space wise in Manhattan.”

Justin had been rubbing the soap up and down Brian’s back in slow, sensual strokes but when he heard what Brian said he stopped moving, stopped breathing. He must have had water in his ears. He shook his head from side to side, quickly, hard to make sure he heard correctly.

“What? What are you talking about Brian? What are you saying, what did you say?” Justin stammered.

“Uh, you can keep washing my back there Sunshine”, Brian said as he turned his head to look at Justin.

“Is it okay if I spend some time with you in New York?” Brian asked sucking in his lips in that way that melted Justin. “Of course, it would only be part time until I knew it would be successful but then we are talking about Brian Kinney aren’t we,” he said with a sly grin.

Justin answered in a way that left no doubt for Brian. He grabbed him, turned him around so that they were facing each other and then pushed him up against the shower wall and kissed him with such fierceness and such love that Brian knew they would do whatever it took for them to be together.

Justin broke their kiss and gently turned Brian around and again began to run the soap along the length of his body. Justin then whispered into Brian’s ear “do you want me to fuck you?” Brian turned his head, his eyes half open, he looked at Justin “well since I fucked you all night and my cock is out of commission, I think that the least you can do is return the favor” and he grabbed a condom and handed it to Justin.


~~~

They stepped from the shower worn out and water wrinkled but very relaxed. They toweled each other off and grabbed their robes and headed to the kitchen.

“Where do you want to eat?” Brian said.

“I’ve already had my protein shake for the day. Correction, make that a few,” Justin said as he came up behind Brian and put his arms around him.

“Well, I need some real food so start thinking! I need to check my email,” Brian said. He walked over to the computer and saw the ring box sitting there. Damn, he thought what the fuck was it with that damn box! He picked it up and turned around and saw Justin sitting at the counter looking over at him with a smile.


“I think I have one more request to honor, don’t I?” Brian said walking over to the kitchen and to Justin. He opened the box removing the ring made for Justin. He took the ring and placed it on Justin’s finger and said, “there may never be locks on our doors, but there is one lock that only you have a key to. I love you Sunshine and I don’t care who fucking knows it!” Brian yelled loudly. Justin had a big smile on his face but it did not compare with the one that Brian had on his own.